


The Mattress Incident

by 42hrb



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Detectives, Brooklyn 99 inspired, M/M, Sterek Week 2016, scene stealer
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-24
Updated: 2016-10-24
Packaged: 2018-08-24 11:07:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,726
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8369914
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/42hrb/pseuds/42hrb
Summary: Stiles and Derek have been dating for a few months when they take on their first case as a couple. Fighting over personal stuff ensues.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by 'The Mattress' episode of Brooklyn 99. A lot of the lines of directly from the show, which I did not write and don't own! 
> 
> Stiles is Jake, Derek is Amy
> 
> Translated into  French  by   
> calliope_83

“You’re two minutes late,” Stiles said to Derek with a smirk on his face, “I was just about to call all the emergency rooms.”

“I went home from your place this morning to shower and I was so tired I fell asleep shaving my face,” Derek said as he sat down, looking around to make sure no one had seen him walking in late. 

“But we went to bed so early, Worst Cooks was over by 10,” Stiles said, then looked around the and said more loudly, “I mean sex, he’s tried from all the sex we had last night.”

“Who are you even talking to?” Derek asked, sounding crabby, either from the lack of sleep or talk about sex at work, or both.

“Precinct,” Stiles said with a look of horror on his face and a shrug. 

“Come on man,” Derek said, then added, “I was up all night because your mattress is so lumpy.”

“But I gave you the good lump,” Stiles said, like there was such a thing as a good lump on a mattress. 

“Please stop talking until I finish my coffee,” Derek said as he took a sip of his 48 ounce coffee and opened up a case file on his desk.

“Ooh a lovers quarrel,” Erica said from her desk near the Captain’s office.  She was painting her nails and eating a donut at the same time.

“No, I’m just tired,” Derek said with a frown, taking another sip of his coffee.

"I didn't ask for details," Erica said, sounding bored.

“I know what will make you feel better,” Stiles said, holding up a bag full of drugs. “Highly potent, liquid speed.”

“Yeah that stuff will get you going,” The perp who was handcuffed to Stiles’ desk said with an excited nod.

“We’re all cops, read the damn room Carl.” Stiles said, setting the bag down and looking up at Derek with a half excited look on his face, hoping to earn back some of the points he lost for his shitty mattress. 

“Wait, is that Taxi?” Derek asked, perking up for the first time that morning as he eyes the yellow vials of liquid.

Stiles grinned at Derek, glad to have made him smile, “Yeah your informant was right, it’s popping up on the corners and down at some of the clubs.”

“My snitches are the best,” Derek said with pride, “The key is to send them hand written thank you notes.”

“Mmhmm,” Stiles said with a fond smile on his face, “So what do you say babe, are you ready to take this partnership from the sheets to the streets to catch some bad guys?”

“Our first case as a couple, do you think we’re ready for it?” Derek asked.  They had only been dating for about 5 months now, though they had worked together for years and had always made a great team.

“Sure, we’ve worked cases together before,” Stiles said with a shrug and then jumped when Scott popped up over his shoulder.

“I just discovered a new drug too,” Scott said with a smile, “It’s called your love and I’m high on it.”

“That’s  _ so _ weird Scott,” Stiles said, standing up and grabbing his jacket as Derek did the same. “I’m going to pretend it never happened.”

“That’s fair!” Scott called as Derek and Stiles walked out of the precinct to start investigating their new case. 

\-----

Three hours later found Stiles standing on the corner with a sign asking for donations and Derek in the car with the informant, waiting for him to spot the dealer. “You look like a grad student in that outfit,” Derek said, his voice a little husky.

“Is that a good thing?” Stiles asked, holding his sign up sheet to a lady who was passing by.

“Yeah,” Derek said and the informant made a face in the back seat. 

“Well then I’m totally a grad student,” Stile said, winking at the car, “I was up writing a paper about, history last night.”

“That’s my dealer,” Carl said, pointing at guy who was walking toward Stiles.

“Stiles, that’s the dealer in the red shirt,” Derek said into the walkie talkie and Stiles took off after him.  When the guy started running Derek got out and followed, leaving the perp in the car to wait.

They chased the dealer into a building and then out onto the fire escape where he jumped and Stiles followed.  They landed on a pile of garbage next to the dumpster and Derek made it in time to hold the guy down while Stiles’ cuffed him.

“Oh,” Derek said, looking down and then away quickly.

“What?” Stiles asked, standing up and brushing himself off.

“It’s just, that looked like your mattress,” Derek said, pointing at the mattress that Stiles had landed on when he had jumped off the fire escape.

“No it’s not,” Stiles said, kicking the trash off the mattress, “Oh shit yes it is.  I have a dumpster mattress.  That’s it, we’re going mattress shopping after work.”

Derek’s face split into a grin, “I’m so proud of you.  And you know when we get a new mattress we’ll have to break it in.”  
“Oh I see what you’re saying,” Stiles said with a smile, “Mattress trampoline. Wait, no you were talking about sex.”

“Yeah,” Derek said with a nod.

\-------

After they booked the dealer and finished their paperwork Stiles and Derek left the precinct and headed to the mattress store.  “All these bad boys are about to be tested, bouncy style.”

“This one is it,” Derek said twenty minutes later as they lay on a mattress with a happy look on his face.

“That’s one of our more affordable sets,” The salesman said as he looked down at them.

“Holy shit that’s much too much money,” Stiles said his eyes wide at the price.

“You spent twice that to have Mr. Met at your birthday last year,” Derek pointed out.

“And that was worth every penny, Mr. Met peed in my bathroom,” Stiles said as if that made all the sense in the world.

“Mattresses are expensive but they’re an investment.”

“That just seems like a lot of money to spend on a rectangle filled with springs and feathers,” Stiles said, “I already have a mattress.”

“But a new mattress would mean I could actually sleep in your bed,” Derek said, starting to sound a little annoyed.

“It just doesn’t seem worth it.” Stiles said, “I have a perfectly adequate mattress at home.”

“Well, to me it sounds like you’re saying I’m not worth it,” Derek said, stepping back from Stiles, “So I’m going to go sleep in my grownup mattress I bought this decade and you’re not invited.”

\--------

The next morning Stiles walked into the precinct to find Derek already at his desk and working, “Good morning, you look well rested.”

Derek looked up and didn’t smile, “Yes, because I slept in my own bed.”

Stiles looked down just as the Captain came over, “We found something strange on the dealer you bought it, he had two matchbooks from the same hotel.  As long as you’re okay with still working together as a couple we need you to go check it out.”

“Of course we are,” Stiles said, “Best couple ever, we aren’t fighting at all.”

The hotel was fancy and once they got all the surveillance set up they went into the room to watch, Derek jumped up onto the bed and Stiles eyed it, “Looks expensive, my butt hates expensive things.”

“I think you’re butt hates making any sacrifices for this relationship and that it’s not seriously about us.” Derek said, standing up and walking toward Stiles. 

“My butt is so serious about us that it should be wearing a tweed jacket,” Stiles shot back, “You’re the one who isn’t serious.”

“I am serious, I’ve made tons of sacrifice for us,” Derek said, “I bought fast food for you.”

“For the last time, Panera isn’t fast food!” Stiles almost yelled.

“Because it’s  _ better _ ,” Derek said.

“If you’re so serious about us, why haven’t you told you mom we’re dating!” Stiles said, going from angry to hurt, “I saw the text about her setting you up with some guy.”

“You read my texts?” Derek deflected.

“It buzzed while you were in the bathroom, who doesn’t bring their phone into the bathroom?”

“It’s not about you, it’s just once I tell her I’m dating someone she’s going to call me about it all the time and I’m going to have to answer a bunch of annoying questions,” Derek said, deflating a little. 

“I guess I’m not ‘worth it’ then,” Stiles said with air quotes around worth it. “Boom, used what you said to me in another argument in this argument, I win.”

“No this is bad,” Derek said looking over Stiles’ shoulder at the TV they had the video stream on, expect now it was just fuzz. 

\--------

Derek walked out of the Captain’s office with a sad look on his face and Stiles walked in. “I can’t believe you let a personal argument effect a police investigation.”

“It was more of a police disagreement,” Stiles said and the Captain gave him a deadpan look, “You listened to the tapes didn’t you?”

“Yes,” He said and Stiles nodded, “A word of advice. If you want to keep Hale, you have to take the plunge or you will regret it.”

“Cool cool cool,” Stiles said.

“Buy the damn mattress.”

“Yes sir,” Stiles said leaving the office. 

\--------

“I was talking to the Captain about some personal stuff,” Stiles said later while he and Derek were staking out the hotel again, this time from the car, “Derek Hale, I want to change mattresses for you.”

Derek grinned, “I’ll call my mom tonight.”

“And we can break the mattress in when it gets delivered on Saturday,” Stiles said with a wink at Derek.

“You do mean sex right?” Derek asked and Stiles nodded, leaning across the gearshift to kiss him.

“Wait that’s our perp!” Stiles said, opening his door and running after him, leaving Derek looking bewildered in the car for a moment before he got out and started chasing too.

They did end up breaking in the mattress that Saturday, and that Sunday. And Stiles definitely turned it into a mattress trampoline while Derek showered on Monday morning. 

**Author's Note:**

> [tumblr](sterekseason.tumblr.com)


End file.
